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Foster care changed my life and brought me my first hug!

This man’s story is beautiful. As a scared little boy in care; he describes how one woman, his foster parent who changed his life. She gave him the one thing he’d not had before; his first hug.

He had his first ‘feeling memory’, and the subsequent fear he felt; simply because he didn’t know what to do. After all; no one had ever done that to him before. A simple gesture from a stranger began the process of healing for a vulnerable child; with foster carers who would be the difference he needed. 

Foster carers are an essential part of healing the pain that, sadly, many children have endured. Often, the smallest gestures have the most significant impact; hugs have the power to make a child feel wanted.

Sadly, that feeling may be the first time it would have been used that didn’t have conditions attached; subsequently, it is the one thing that can teach a child to trust.

How many of us can say we remember our first hug?

I watched this video; for me, it is heartbreaking and very thought-provoking. The love and respect this man has for his foster parents shines through him; how many of us can say that we remember our first hug?

I take it for granted that a hug shows how I feel for someone; as adults, we usually provide them with ease. Sadly, for children who faced abuse and trauma, hugs and contact by people offering comfort are rare; they don’t know how to react, other than to mistrust.

This feeling is hard to process; because children often have nothing to link it to, and therefore, they are unable to comprehend it. However, good foster carers understand; they have an inherent empathy for children when no words are needed. They do what needs to be done and lead the way for children in care with kindness and compassion.

Foster carers understand the power of a hug.

Children in care need loving homes with people who have the time to devote to them; ultimately, we need people who understand the power of a hug.

As this man shows, his foster carer shaped his future and his whole life on that one memory; it wasn’t a statement it was a feeling. Thus; the depth of feeling he had from a simple gesture, subsequently, shaped the path he walks as an adult.

Foster carers are angels; they are the all-hearing and all-seeing people who have an innate understanding and empathy with children; ultimately, they want to make a difference in a child’s life. They have tenderness, they have compassion, and they have the kindness to relate to children in abundance.

The simplest of gestures is the turning point to healing.

Sadly, many children have endured abuse; they have been let down and are in care; consequently, children need foster carers with the right experience and care to give them the support they need.

This video highlights how the simplest of gestures became the turning point for positive memories. It is the difference between healing and giving a child a feeling of belonging and being safe or continuing their trauma.

Many children in care need foster carers to understand the simple things because, for children, life shouldn’t be complicated. If you are the difference that children need in your community, please get in touch with Verve on the form below, and arrange a call?

‘Together, we can all make a difference in the lives of vulnerable children and young people.’


Together, we can make a difference!

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